


Sympathy for the Devil Outtakes

by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel



Series: Sympathy for the Devil [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-13
Updated: 2013-12-13
Packaged: 2018-01-04 12:29:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1081024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/pseuds/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What it says on the tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Outtake: Bobby is Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Thanks to a comment by Whit Merule on Sympathy for the Devil (and Dean Winchester), I ended up writing a cracky outtake where it turns out Bobby is Michael. Figured I'd clean it up and post it here._

**Outtake: Bobby is Michael**

Bobby didn't go on hunts on his own so often anymore - he was getting older, after all, and some day Sam and Dean were going to give him a heart attack with their antics, he just knew it - but when rumours of some 'holy tree' supposedly curing the ills of any who touched it reached him, well, he decided it couldn't hurt to take a look at the damn thing. What happened next was a pretty big surprise, though.

* * *

The first thing he did afterwards was reinstate a surprised Castiel's connection to Heaven.

"Bunch of bureaucratic upstarts have no clue what they're supposed to be doing," he grumbled. "Kicking out the one angel actually doing something right. Idjits."

At this point Lucifer, who had been staring at him with an expression that really deserved to be captured on camera, slowly sank down onto his bed and put his head in his hands like it just wasn't worth going on anymore.

"You've got to be kidding me. Father's actively trying to screw with me, isn't he?"

"Don't be so damn dramatic," Michael growled at him. He'd had enough of Lucifer's tantrums over the millennia. "Stop acting like a petulant teenager, and help me figure out a way to fix this mess you caused."

Lucifer's face wavered between gratitude and outrage.

"Uh, Bobby? Am I missing something?" Sam wanted to know.

 "Bobby is Michael," Castiel explained helpfully, still looking a touch stunned himself.

 Sam's face at that revelation was even more amusing than Lucifer's had been.

 "Uh. Okay. Uh, Dean? You and Michael can stay here and sort out your plans to stop the apocalypse. I need a drink."

 With that Sam left the hotel room in search of the nearest bar.

 Castiel looked between Lucifer and Michael, and came to a conclusion.

 "I will help him," the seraph announced, and flew out of the motel room in Sam's wake.


	2. Outtake: Zachariah finds out that Sam and Dean are Michael and Lucifer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _So, in Sympathy for the Devil Zachariah was killed off about halfway through, but someone expressed disappointment that he didn’t live long enough to find out that Sam was Michael. So. In this AU, Zachariah never found out that Dean is actually Lucifer. Sam is next to his Grace tree about to reclaim his Grace when Zachariah shows up looking for Dean and Sam._

**Outtake: Zachariah finds out that Sam and Dean are Michael and Lucifer**

“Dean?” Sam asked questioningly.

“You need to touch the big-ass tree Sammy,” Lucifer said, as evenly as possible.

Sam swallowed, a look of dread on his face, but obediently approached the tree with Michael’s Grace in it.

And wouldn’t you know it, just as Sam reached it, Zachariah popped up next to Lucifer.

Lucifer smirked dangerously.

“Zachariah.”

Zachariah frowned suspiciously at the smirk, and glanced around at his surroundings. His eyes bulged at the sight of Sam standing next to a tree holding what was clearly recognizable as Michael’s Grace.

“What–” he started.

“Oh, Michael’s just about to reclaim his Grace,” Lucifer explained casually, right before Sam touched the tree, and Michael’s Grace exploded out to engulf him.

When it was over, Michael turned, and spotted Zachariah.

Michael immediately pulled on the _‘I’m not angry, I’m disappointed’_ face, mixed in with a fair bit of annoyance. A moment later and Michael was standing with Lucifer and Zachariah, who looked like a deer in headlights.

“You removed my lungs,” Michael said, in profound irritation.

Zachariah looked like someone who wasn’t used to grovelling, but thought that right now might be a good time to start learning.

“My lord Michael – I was just–”

But Michael was staring at Lucifer.

“Lucifer,” he said tentatively. “We should talk.”

_“Lucifer?!”_

Zachariah sounded like he was about to go into cardiac arrest. Lucifer gave Zachariah his nastiest, most urbane smile, and the smarmy little angel blanched.

“Yeah. Lucifer,” he purred smoothly. “I thought it would be a good idea to stay under the radar. Your methods have been very… _enlightening._ ”

“We can deal with him later,” Michael said intensely. “Or you can give him to Gabriel, I don’t care–”

“Oh, that’s  good idea, Gabriel’ll probably love it,” Lucifer mused, delighted.

“–but right now, I really think we have a long-overdue conversation to be getting on with,” Michael persisted.

“Fine. Gabriel can go all Trickster on his ass while we talk,” Lucifer conceded.

“Did someone call my name?” Gabriel chirped, appearing out of nowhere. He took one look at Michael, gaped, glanced at Lucifer, and then gave a long whistle.

“Well, _that_ changes things,” he drawled.

“Gabriel,” said Lucifer. “Zachariah’s guilty of being a massive douche. Care to re-educate him?”

Gabriel glanced at Zachariah, who looked pop-eyed with terror.

Gabriel’s smile was frightening.

“Glad to, brother.” He snapped his fingers, and both he and Zachariah vanished from sight.


End file.
